Be Yourself

I have a small box on my desk, filled with cards containing motivational quotes. It was a gift from a former supervisee with whom I had the pleasure of working. I am sure it was meant to be a “quote of the day” thing but the reality is that in the two years since I received this gift, I am only about a quarter of the way through. I enjoy seeing these quotes and look at the same one for days before I move on to the next one.

Today I looked at the next card and found this quote by Shirley Briggs:

Let’s dare to be ourselves, for we do that better than anyone else can.

I had to look up Shirely Briggs. I had never heard of her. According to Wikipedia, Shirley Briggs was an artist, photographer, writer, editor and naturalist. I had a little laugh about that quote. Shirley knew about what motivates people and tapped into that by suggesting that this is something we can do “better than anyone else can”. And who can resist a “dare”?

Is being ourselves such a daring thing? Many of you know the pain than comes from being you, when that differs greatly from who others are or from what loved ones want you to be. It is hard to not be accepted as we are, it leaves us feeling shame which we avoid by working hard to be someone else. This is how parts can form. We develop parts that help us be accepted, help us belong, tell us that we are not good enough as we are and if only we were more outgoing, compliant, funny, smart, pretty, strong or whatever it is that your parts have determined you need to be, you will be acceptable.

You are acceptable as you are and only need to be you. There is value and worth in who you are and inner peace will come when first, you learn who you are, then accept it and finally love it. This peace you will never feel as long as you try to be someone else, or try to be what another person wants you to be. Let’s take Shirley up on her dare!